This Week: Five Things That Caught My Eye
or how i'm trying to survive American necropolitics in real-time
Inhale. Exhale.
Some quick housekeeping: I dumped all of my “Queer Ultimatum: 2” thoughts into a TikTok, god help me. And Chris was kind enough to ask me to interview THEE Robin Givhan about her new biography of Virgil Abloh, which I really enjoyed as a simultaneous oral history of streetware and fashion in the early aughts.
I’m still spinning out about the news. As someone who clearly remembers the way WIC supported my family during some tenuous years, this news is not abstract for some of us. If your trauma response is fight, or you’re gung-ho and ready to make an action plan, the GOAT Ayana has some great and motivating suggestions. If you’re still in freeze/fawn like me, read on.
After reading about the ramifications of the cruel, cruel megabill that just passed, the lives that will be lost, the suffering that will be multiplied beyond comprehension, on top of the bone-chilling prison camp in the Everglades and the outcome of the D*ddy trial, I walked out of my office and sat down on my couch to try and process some of the news. I don’t even remember falling asleep. Even with notifications off and whittling down the stressors in my life, my nervous system is a wreck. I’m trying to learn new ways of being and coping so that I can stay energized and show up for the fights ahead. This lovely breathing meditation was sent to me by the equally lovely Zarah, and I’ve been using it most mornings, to gather up the threads of thoughts that are racing through my mind as I come into consciousness. It’s based on Nadi Shodhana, alternate nostril breathing, but instead of physically blocking the nostrils, you rely on awareness and a visual practice. My max for a guided meditation is usually about five minutes, but this one goes by in a snap. Hope there’s something in there for you, too.
Early morning swims. The water has always been my best technology for combatting numbness and getting back into my body. A friend and I like to drive out early on these hotass mornings — like 7AM — and swim for a few hours before returning home to write and do life admin. One of the perks of going that early is the heightened likelihood of seeing dolphins (!). Knowing I’ve started my day in water soothes something primordial in my spirit. Lizard brain tamed, energy points boosted. The will to live increases. The filmmaker Agnes Varda once said if we opened people up, we’d find landscapes. If you cut me open, you’d find the ocean.
Cherry season has arrived at the farmers markets here, and I can’t get enough. I’ve been bringing them with me everywhere — for steamy patio aperitivos, trips to the movies, rooftop hangs and setting them out for guests. I’ve gotten both sour cherries and black cherries, and neither disappoints. They’re rich and tangy, juicy enough to drip down your hands while you eat. I bought way too many this week so I ended up using my cherry pitter to freeze the extras to make slushies to hydrate and sustain the folks in my life while we walk through the park and plot our next moves.
I recently completed Chani’s 28-day breakthrough course about getting unstuck, and moving stagnant energy in your life. I live and breathe healing work, but I’ve never done things like make a vision board, somatic shaking (dancing) exercises, mirror work or paid much attention to the hygiene of my evening routine. If you know anything about Chani’s work, then you know she’s all about orienting towards community and social justice, and the course helped me strengthen my sense of self while unearthing clarity around my relationships and life purpose. Some of those miraculous shifts reminded me that most feelings are temporary, and replenished some of the hopelessness I’ve been nursing over the last few weeks.
Kids dancing on the bows of boats racing during Pacu Jalur, a traditional Indonesian competition that has history going back to the 17th century. There’s not much joy right now, but this has been one pure and uncut source.
Forgive all the typos everyone! I'm doing the best I can :)
Hope is a real struggle for me but reading this really offered me a soothing something. Thank you bb. We ARE together in this.❤️